Monday, June 20, 2011

This Whole Pregnancy Deal....from a man's perspective

I tend to throw out whatever comes to my mind. So, as I've been introduced to a whole new world of interesting baby gadgets, I've had a few things to say. Amy thinks they're funny, so she's been begging me to post my perspective on a few interesting items we have come to own.

The first item on our list of interesting gadgets is the bassinet. At first, I thought this was a really nice portable crib. I didn't understand the concept nor did I know how we were supposed to fold this thing up to take it on trips with us. Then Amy explained to me that this lovely item is called a bassinet and it's a crib that goes in our room. What?! Max has the nicest room in the house...upstairs...where he can sleep and so can I. Thank you Mr. or Mrs. Whomever Created This Little Piece of Heaven. I'm sure it will do wonders for my sleep habits.

The infamous Snoogle. It's a huge friggin pillow that, as you can see, takes up more than half the bed. Throw a dog in there and you can guarantee yourself 8 months of restless sleep...I guess it's meant to prepare me for the bassinet.

Next is the diaper genie. Sounds like a great idea, but then I started to really think about it. What the heck is coming out of this kid that he needs is own, special trash can? Seriously?

The Pump In Style. This just looks outright scary. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure this is a wonderful contraption, but two words come to my mind when I see this...weird and painful. And, I don't really get the name. You don't actually use this in front of people, right? So why does it have to be fashionable and in style? I think a better name would be "Double Pump Chump", but nobody asked me.

Some of you may be asking "why did he post a picture of a neck pillow". Well those of you asking that question are men and apparently I wasn't using it for it's intended purpose. This little guy is called a boppy breast feeding pillow. This one actually makes sense to me since it has multiple uses and doubles as a neck pillow for adults...quite comfortable too.

Seriously? This thing actually exists? It's called a "pumping bra". I don't think any further explanation is necessary.

Now, there are only 2 items that really make any legitimate sense at all to me. The first being the pee pee tepee. I've been told I probably won't use it, but I don't know why. I'm not a big fan of the thought of my kid spraying his fire hose all over the cover it up with the tepee. Seems logical.

Last but definitely not least is the daddy caddy. This thing has it all. Glasses, gloves, diapers, wipes, bottles, bulb thingy, etc. And with this thing, you may not even need the pee pee tepees.

In all seriousness, Amy and I have had a good laugh about most of this stuff. We have a lot to learn about this new world of babies, diapers and poo and I'm sure we'll come to appreciate all these fun little gadgets. In the meantime, we'll just keep having fun with stuff.


  1. I know you have no clue who I am... but I'm a sucker for baby blogs since I have a 2 year old and 7 week old. HILARIOUS post. I have to say the "expression" pumping bra is THE BEST THING EVER invented! I blog and pump...perfection! Other must haves: boppy and pump. The rest: totally useless. The diaper genie does not neutralize odors after they start to eat food. My advice: save your grocery bags, throw them in, tie them off and straight to the outdoor can they go! FYI, good call on the goggles...boys pee those tee pees right off! haha

  2. I don't quite remember how I stumbled across your blog but have been following along for a bit now and am praying for your sweet Max!! You are about to experience the greatest love of all time, from the moment you set eyes upon him your life will be forever changed with the purest kind of love!
    And BTW I have to say that I was laughing out loud at this post. Absolutely hilarious!!

  3. I think you are going to make an awesome Daddy...

  4. This has made my day! Love it! You have come along way from being a video star!